


Lullaments of the Moon

by MrsLonelyCat



Category: His Dark Materials (TV), His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
Genre: Damaged love, Innocent hope, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Motherhood, POV Original Female Character, Sisterhood, The Subtle Knife, Troubled parents, alternative universe, lonely girl, second daughter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:15:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28134522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsLonelyCat/pseuds/MrsLonelyCat
Summary: » "-Marisa Coulter, a very beautiful and intelligent woman. Just by seeing her you could fall into her charm and listening to her is hypnotizing. – She answered without hesitation. Internally I celebrated having a name… Marisa Coulter, a beautiful name and apparently hers as well, which made me excited and uneasy to start looking for her. . - But she is evil, cruel, sadistic and with hollow feelings. An icy heart.[..] I must find her." «Any small variation in initial conditions can imply great differences in future behavior, even a slight lullament of the moon can object to such changes to bend the destiny of a time line and space; in the prominence of a little girl with an objective giant, passing adventures, meeting characters and discovering truths until she finds her mother.
Relationships: Lyra Belacqua & Marisa Coulter, Marisa Coulter & Original Female Character(s), Original Female Character(s) & Lyra Belacqua
Comments: 21
Kudos: 45





	1. Prelude

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer:  
> *I do not own the books or the series, nor the characters in His Dark Materials. I own OC and dæmon.  
> *I will discard the mention of issues of religion since it is a subject that I prefer to respect the beliefs of all. (maybe make a mention about the fact that the Dust is the spirit).  
> *I apologize if you find something misspelled, English is not my mother tongue.

_They say that the princess Orihime (also called the weaver princess), wove dresses for her father (wove the clouds of the sky) on the banks of the river. Her father was the heavenly king. Orihime fell in love with a modest shepherd named Kengyu. Both, upon seeing each other, fell madly and passionately in love, to the point where the two lovers began to neglect their work to be together. This made the heavenly god, Tenkou, so enraged that he forbade them to see each other anymore and placed each of them on a different bank of the river of heaven, that is, the Milky Way._

_The princess, very sad, begged her father to see her beloved once more. Finally, he took pity and allowed the lovers to meet again on a bridge over the river once a year, on the seventh night of the seventh month. But this only happens if the heavenly god is happy with his daughter's job and makes it no rain that night because, if not, they won't be able to see each other until the following year._

I imagined that this legend was about my parents, maybe it is a way of seeing the sense for the reason that they abandoned me or had to go and leave me here, but believing that their story is like that is better than any fairy tale in where they end with a "they got married, they were happy and they ate partridges."

I longed for the day that they seemed to look for me, every day I woke up with the enthusiasm that today would be the day, I had never declined for a single moment even when the old woman and my tutor stated that they would never come for me, no, my hope was still in foot.

-And you must start eating when others do or if permission is given. Sitting up straight at dinner is a show of respect. You should keep your elbows off the table while eating… Are you paying attention?

-Yes ma'am. - I nodded, straightening on the mahogany table as the lesson on behavior was given at a dinner party. Madame Delamare nodded in agreement and continued with the lesson until she gave me the freedom to do whatever I wanted while she retired to visit one of her old friends.

I ran up the stairs once I was not in sight of the old woman, I went to my room looking for something to play with, finally I took the cyan ball and hit it on the floor of my room; playing for a few minutes with Opal, who tricky turned into various animals to make it work for him. Everything was going fine until the ball hit the wall next to me, it sounded deaf, I ran to get the ball and looked at the wall, it had opened. Panic choked me and I went over to see if I could fix it until I noticed that it was a door; inside there is a staircase that went up in a spiral; A smile widened on my face, I dropped the ball and ran towards the stairs with enthusiasm.

Upon reaching the room, a loft, full of boxes of different sizes and a couple of toys from many years; I could see in the distance a wooden rocking horse with a faint pink color, all things covered with a thick layer of dust.

-Wow. This is incredible. I have my own loft and I didn't know it. I spoke, looking at Opal in her brown ermine form with her white bib and the tip of her short black tail, on my shoulder.

-Who owns all these things? - He asked, lowering my shoulder and going through the boxes.

We started looking at the boxes, many are written with: "Books", "Dresses", "Baby" or "Marisa" or a simple "M", until I found one that said "Photograms", I automatically opened it with joy; it's fun to watch photogram. Many are of a girl, the photograms are black and white so much could not be noticed in them but I could deduce that her eyes are blue and her dark hair, very beautiful, too much. I wondered if she is, she would be the daughter of Madame Delamare since she herself had told me that she had a daughter who was very successful and that based on that, she is educating me.

-Alls.

I got up and went to my daemon, which was on a box that had my name written on its forehead in beautiful calligraphy like the other boxes; I opened it quickly, finding pastel baby clothes, all very precious, one in particular, a pastel reddish dress with my name embroidered on the left breast. I picked it up and smelled it, a very nice soft scent and a slight floral scent. It is strange that this was here, I have been an orphan since I was two years old, according to the words of Madame Delamare, my mother could not take care of me and left me with the old woman ... technically, that would not make me an orphan, just abandoned. It doesn't make sense that there are baby clothes anyway, unless Madame lied to me.

I kept observing all the things that were there with Opal; clothes, a pair of board shoes (two bows one on top of the other; the top is made of fabric and the bottom is like the lace but thicker both above where the toes would go, a lace around the " mouth ”of the shoe and a strap to lock the foot inside) very beautiful, a beige pacifier with a transparent“ ring ”, flexible baby toys, a knitted blanket in pink, gray and light blue in pastel tones with its plush fleece interior, about it was what caught my attention, a letter.

_“Your Mum.”_

Those were the words written with the same calligraphy as the one on the boxes, the same M made in all of them, which is curious and strange. I took a moment to trace the letters; I had not realized that my eyes had filled with tears to what it meant because my mother loved me. I opened the envelope, still sealed with glue, and took out the letter.

_“Dear Halley:_

_My little comet, this is the strangest thing anyone could do but I can't find another way to stop my grief of you, it has been months since you left my arms, since your little heart has stopped ..._

_How can I get over you? You were so small, so sweet, so happy… oh, how I miss your angelic laugh._

_Why should you have left? Why wasn't it me and not you? How can I live ..._

_My baby ... my little piece of heaven, you were everything I had and now I have nothing, only pure materials that do not interest me. Your father has gone north for so long that I have not been able to give him this exhausting news ... neither do I wish it, I do not want to feel this burning pain again when remembering your loss, the emptiness you have left, it is regrettable that it should be done, but you must know. So this will be the final chapter to be able to move on even with the pain and emptiness still intact. Just for you._

_I love you, my Halley’s Comet, I always will._

_Your Mama."_

I had no words for what you just read. My mother and apparently my father, believe that I am dead; I didn't understand why; my mind was going very fast, both parties had different stories about the purpose of each part, on my part it was something that Madame Delamare had told me and the part of her ... who knows.

-Do you think Madame is lying about everything? –Asked Opal next to me.

-I don't know but it's very likely. Hope not ... We need to find out Mama's name. –I spoke saddened by what I had read. I put the letter in the envelope and put all the objects inside, except the letter and a soft stuffed animal of a pastel yellow bear disguised as a gray tabby cat; I ran back to my room in pastel shades of light blue and closed the door of the attic, I left the doll in the center of my bed and the letter in the drawer of the night table and then ran to the only confidante who was going to tell me everything. The cook, McNeils, had been working here for years, because of what she had said since Madame Delamare had married Monsignor, she had dealt with her two children and now with me, although I am not related… well, as far as Madame had said.

I got to the kitchen, finding her preparing dinner, as usual I began to help her while I thought about how I should develop the topic and the question whether to look suspicious.

-Mrs McNeils? - I asked shyly.

-Tell me, precious.

-I have come here for about three years and I have met Madame's son, Marcel ... he comes every selfless month to see Madame. - I spoke carefully, I saw that she nodded, encouraging me to continue. -But I have never seen Madame's daughter.

-She never comes, I doubt that one day she will enter that door again. She has done nasty things and has humiliated herself, a few years ago she had an altercation with her mother… I don't remember why.

-It's a shame, Madame said that she has a great career for the education she gave her and that she wants the same from me, it would have been fantastic to meet her. What's her name? – I asked casually while she placed the carrots that she cut into the pot.

-Marisa Coulter, a very beautiful and intelligent woman. Just by seeing her you could fall into her charm and listening to her is hypnotizing. – She answered without hesitation. Internally I celebrated having a name… Marisa Coulter, a beautiful name and apparently hers as well, which made me excited and uneasy to start looking for her. - But she is evil, cruel, sadistic and with hollow feelings. An icy heart.

I observed McNeils before the last descriptive words to the personality of what would be my mother, at first I worry but then I stopped doing it, I never listened to adults; They are resentful, capricious, judicious and also each had a different description of other people than others so I do not care ... maybe, when I find her, she will be pretty and loving with me. I must find her.


	2. Inquiry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The investigation progresses and the adventure begins.

It's always fun to sneak out of the house, I felt like a spy and a detective as I will find out more about my mom at the Grand Library; They already knew me for always going and reading, I had my membership because Madame Delamare liked that I always wanted to read so I was going to take advantage of it. If she was very successful in her career, she had to be registered or have a family tree book ... or is that in a family library? Well, I didn't know but I wanted to know more about her, maybe I worked in something important like an organization or who knows what I could find.

I came to the counter with a very thud as I hit the wood, scaring the librarian Evie, I laughed out loud at her start.

-Harry! - She screamed with one last breath mixed with scolding as she held his chest as if her heart was about to escape.

-Hi, Evie. Harry reporting. - I smiled at her with all my baby teeth exposed.

-What are you doing here alone? Madame Delamare? –The young librarian questioned.

-In the House. She woke up with a bad headache. –I commented. Everything is true, today a maid announced to me that Madame Delamare could not see me at the day's lesson due to a severe headache. - So I did not want to miss my study day and surprise her. Maybe it will even make you feel better, don't you think? - I asked with another smile so that she would stop asking me why I was not accompanied by an adult.

-It's very sweet of you, I'm very sure it will do her good. Now what can I do for you that will brighten Madame's day?

-I would like to read about the lady who works for the magisterium, as I understand she is the daughter of Madame Delamare. - I commented, restless. Madame Delamare had told me, her daughter works for the Magisterium, she was not very detailed and did not encourage me to ask, but it was enough to know that perhaps she has some history of what my mother could be, especially where she would be working for so go see it. –Madame Delamare is educating me in the same way and believes that I can reach the same as my m… as… do you have water? –I made up, after almost saying that she is my mother. She pointed to a corner that had a water dispenser and some metal glasses next to it, meanwhile the librarian promised to find the books she would need; I ran into the water when the woman walked away. I quickly took the water and ran to where Evie had gone; On a glass table he left a couple of thick books with black leather covers and the Magisterium symbol in the center, I thanked him and started looking for his name, Opal helped me with my homework, I on one page and he on another .

It was in the second book, the most “current” that I found her name, there was no frame, only in which area she worked in the Magisterium and that she is a scientist… in a few words. Similarly, I had the area in which I worked, I found out one of the Magisterium buildings, discovering one in Geneva.

I slammed the book shut and ran out of the library, continued running to Madame Delamare's house and up the stairs to my room; I took a dress, a shirt, a coat, a dungarees and underwear, put everything in a backpack, looked for the treasures I had found in the attic, I did not know what to bring ... I ended up taking everything out of the box, finding a necklace in the Bottom of the box and photograms, without seeing them, place them neatly in the backpack, also add the dress with the embroidery and as I could the stuffed animal that I had left on the bed because I slept with it, and the letter. Ready, I looked at my room, hoping not to forget anything.

-Money, Alls. –Opal remembered. I looked for my savings, luckily, sometimes Madame would give me gifts for my achievements in her lessons, I never knew why she was giving me money, now I could realize how grateful I am for it. I packed my large amount of savings in my backpack and ran to the window, climbing down, and then running off the property.

I had to stop and ask someone where the zeppelins embark but when I arrived, I couldn't contain my excitement.

The employees had their doubts as to why a very young girl was there without the presence of an adult but I was able to cleverly convince them that I would go where my mother is; Their faces hadn't been very calm about it, but they allowed me to board the zeppelin, probably because of my neat appearance and that I had money with me. Opal turned into a black panther to show elegance, which helped. In a few minutes, I sat on a seat and looked out the window, smiling at my adventure. To Gineva and to mum.

I settled into the seat and rummaged in my backpack, took one of the photograms and looked at it; a sleeping baby, wrapped in the same blanket that he had found in that box, was being held in the arms of someone ... a woman, although only one of her hands could be seen, a wavy lock of her hair and a pretty smile. I couldn't stop looking at her until I fell asleep. I dreamed of mum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter without much information but I hope you liked it anyway. I'll upload another one later so you can enjoy it more and because we need the awesome characters from the fandom.


	3. The Lady of Geneva

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arriving in Geneva, the little girl meets a beautiful lady.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This would be at the end of episode 2 of the second season. Enjoy it!

The sun was shining in the middle of the day, a light breeze appeared from time to time producing a pleasant sound as it hit the leaves of the trees and the bright green ground towards the impressive place. I ran towards the great building, I crossed many faces, the men in their black colors that were heading in various directions, they turned their eyes when they saw me pass because I am a very prominent point, not only because of the color of my hair but because of my dark red dress.

Arriving in front of the building, I stopped to admire the great building; Its details very well defined and everything very neat, I was advancing while still looking up but a peculiar sound caught my attention, the same sound that I heard in Madame Delamare's mansion, heels. I could have looked but the statues in the building caught my eye while I was still moving forward and the sound had already died. Someone stopped me, a hand on my shoulder, in front of me.

When I looked at the face, I could feel my mouth open. It is beautiful. Her blue eyes shone in the light and stood out against her elegant and neat black wardrobe, her hair perfectly arranged and held, wearing a hat; her golden monkey shone like my hair, which was surprising.

-What is a little girl like you doing in a place like this? –The Lady questioned with a beautiful smooth voice.

-He… Hello, Lady, I'm just looking for... for information on the… whereabouts of… a relative. -Butter. -It's probably here.- I tried to explain, seeing how at the end a smile spread on his face and provoked mine. It was very familiar to me but I couldn't remember it, I should remember it.

-Well, you shouldn't be here anyway. This is no place for a beautiful girl like you.

-In that case, what are you doing here? I asked in the same tone as her. She cackle with a nice sound and I smiled at her mischievously; I wondered if my mother was like her, so pretty, because the photograms I had found didn't look good; I had not seen the last ones I had found in those boxes, only the first one I found, the one with the baby, stored in my skirt pocket right now.

-I am an adult but you… it is not an appropriate place for a little girl, you should go back to your mother.

-I'm an orphan… for the moment…- I replied, lowering my head to my sparkly mary jane’s, noticing the lady’s sparkly matching heels.

-It is not correct that you lie blatantly. –The lady spoke firmly. I looked up, noticing her frown, looking at me with judgment in her eyes.

-What? Oh, my clothes, Madame shelters me but I'm an orphan. -I said looking at my pretty clothes, not as nice as hers but still pretty.

-You say you're looking for a relative. -She asked me confused, and I nodded quickly.

-He may have a relative. -I commented, returning with my happiness, smiling at her with all my teeth. She watched me, just watching me with a slight, almost invisible smile. -You know, you look familiar but I don't think I've ever met you. Well, I don't think it's easy to forget someone like you. -I talked. I glanced at her daemon who was watching me suspiciously, then glanced at Opal beside me in her now usual form of a yaguaroundi cougar approaching the golden monkey curiously but cautiously. Out of nowhere, a sneeze from me changed Opal's shape to a brown ermine.

-Bless you. Strangely I feel the same. -She spoke without looking at me, just looking at Opal.

-Thank you. -I was grateful, and I shrugged my shoulders, twisted my head, watching her to see if I could remember her from somewhere but nothing appeared; I never left the house unless it was to go to the library but I never went out and Madame Delamare's events were old people. -Who knows? Maybe it's just a crazy thing about us. –I spoke with a laugh but it did not infect Lady, she seemed surprised and shocked.

-Maybe. -She murmured, not quite convinced by my weird logic.

-I like you and your daemon is very beautiful. -I expressed, looking at the glowing monkey that was still looking at Opal; I was hoping that when it would settle as something this quirky. I realized that the sun was beginning to descend so I had to say goodbye to Lady and go back to my search. -I'm sorry, but I have to go. It is and was a pleasure. Goodbye.

I waved my hand in goodbye salute, surrounded the lady and ran up the stairs with Opal whispering my name so that I will wait for him; I looked back seeing Lady still looking at me seriously but with a lost and sad look, I stopped when I noticed it and I was about to return until Lady smiled at me, raised her hand in greeting and continued towards her direction, leaving. I continued observing her, in conflict but Opal reminded me of my objective and that I did not know Lady to do something for her, sighing I turned to the surprising building and ran inside, marveling at the architecture inside, everything outside was nothing.

I walked the corridors undetected by the men passing by as they were talking to each other about a new cardinal or whatever, I kept walking, hoping to find a secretary or that at least someone would stop me and ask me since I tried to ask several but they continued his path. There was no secretary and I wondered why she had not asked Lady, that led me to wonder about her, I did not know her name, Madame Delamare would have looked at me with disapproval or have made me worse as it had happened a few times in the past. Not thinking about what she would do if found me in my adventurous escape, probably worse. I wondered if Lady had children and what she would be like as a mother, what I wouldn't give for my mother to be like her; pretty, nice, curious, ¡she had worried that she was in this place!

Going down some stairs I realized that I had lost myself thinking about Lady and Madame Delamare. There were some guards there, talking to each other very joyfully, seeing the open iron gate, I entered with slow steps so that they would not hear me, I walked down the corridor towards the metal door that was there; I was just going out of curiosity what might be there, maybe treasures or a dragon but when I opened it (after opening it with my hair pins as I had learned in my boredom at home) I was not expecting what I found.


	4. If Only

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A narrative around Marisa and her struggle of maternal instincts.

Her elegance was shown in her decorum and refinement. Her discretion in her intelligence is something intangible, allowed only to those she sees worthy; a prudence and cunning without equal, impossible to imitate. Difficult to describe but easy to perceive as soon as she enters a room.

Marisa Coulter, born with those adjectives, is aware of it and praises it with pride; can be seen in her walk and her high forehead, nothing seemed to hinder her and of course she shouldn't, her intelligence, rejected in a world of men, gave her the power to think strategically about every line to takeand get away with it in a single blink. Although her intelligence gave her such power, her beauty had its close pact with intelligence and the great ambition that also resided in her, taking her on large scales that surprised men and like a girl throwing flowers that housed and flooded envy, resentment and dislike in them.

As she walked with his millimetrically calculated steps, passing the mens with a smile printed on his face, organizing all the things to do in his mind, listing them over and over again on his way to the zeppelin but at intervals his mind set out to fail her to the memory of a few moments ago. The memory of the little red-haired girl.

She was frustrated that such a memory appeared, not finding sense that her mind would be weakened by such a thing, she mentally repeated that it was only a common girl who had the chance to cross paths. Beside her, following in her footsteps, the golden monkey looked up at her human, squinting her button eyes as he sensed, through their connection, the unease that a simple encounter caused.

An annoyance developed in the center of her belly that caused her to stop walking, an uncomfortable sensation formed in the back of her mind, spreading, prompting her to return to the building, the maternal instinct had been activated but she refused. She is just an unknown girl, she told herself. She closed his eyes, thinking of Lyra and only Lyra, her daughter, the only girl who should allow herself to be in the center of her mind; she must begin her search promptly, board a zeppelin heading north but her mind stumbled, once again, and she remembered.

A childlike cry of a newborn, the weight in his arms, the softness of the snowy skin and the sweet and warm homely aroma, the silkiness of the curly bronze red hair and the musicality of the laugh, his touch and his presence. Strangely, similar to the girl seen earlier.

She shook his head, opening his eyes blurred by tears but skillfully, dismissing them as those memories that he preferred to forget and also keep in a corner of his heart. It was reiterated that girl is not the one who flowed with resistance and love in her mind, it could not be, it could never be, no matter how much she yearned for the opposite, it is impossible.

She continued his steps forward with his forehead held high and a smile at the thought of Lyra although internally he struggled to silence his agitated and warrior heart but ended up being bowed to his final order although his belly produced a discomfort as if there was a high density rock and the back of his mind with an uneasy itch but Marisa Coulter did not pay his attention, continued his step towards his eldest daughter, bending his mind to focus on her.

If just only. If only she knew that that little girl is what her maternal instinct begged her for, if only she knew that that girl was what she wanted, that that girl was looking for her with the hopeful heart and soul of a warrior. If only she knew that that girl is her little daughter.

Perhaps things had been in a completely different way for the simple fact of looking for that little girl, protecting her and taking her in. Maybe not.

The distance between the two grew, once again in their lives, but not their minds, in a small encounter they had become intertwined as in their past when the girl had not yet known the outside world; it will cause white nights, awake and hope. One part struggling with the attractive magnetism, another part immune to repel and running in that direction without fear.

The third time in Marisa Coulter's life that someone would interfere with her rich adjectives and lead her intelligence to clumsiness. Undermining the hardest of metals that armored his heart, but she would not know it until it was late, meanwhile his mind continues evaluating the possible paths that he would take when he finds his eldest daughter, cunningly evaluating everything she would carry out until obtaining her and cost it would bring. His mind reasons the protection he should provide his daughter when she was in danger. Ignoring the seed planted in an unknown corner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! I hope you had a great time in this new beginning.
> 
> Here, new chapter, was unexpected and in the last minute. It was difficult for me to get rid of this idea and I ended up giving in, I was very pleased with the final result that I am thinking of creating more chapters like this one, showing Marisa's perspective narrated. It is short but there was nothing more to add to it and I felt that this is perfect, I hope you really liked it and enjoyed it.
> 
> [I apologize if there is something misspelled.]


	5. The Man in the Cage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The little girl meets a character in custody.

The man sitting on a bed that looked more like a piece of ground, his daemon in the shape of a small dog, not like the guards who are giant dogs, this is pretty. The man in the room that looked more like a cage, was watching me with a frown, confused that I was there and as a friendly greeting I smiled at him.

-Hello. –I saluted and entered even with my silent and measured steps so that the men outside would not hear me. -What are you doing here? Is stopped? Why?

-Hello, girl. I am, you shouldn't be here, it's not an appropriate place for you, go with your mother. –The man spoke, his voice is rough and strong, he looked straight ahead of him, ignoring me. Sure I expected me to leave but I still did not want to, I never met a detained person.

-I'm looking for it but nobody wants to tell me where to go. She is supposed to work here. –I rejoiced as I sat in front of him, on another bed made of a door. I was struck by the floral smell that I could distinguish, it is a woman's perfume, Lady's perfume but at the same time I felt that I had smelled it elsewhere.

-Didn't you hear what I said, girl? Get out of here. These people are less than good. Go. –He said leaning towards me but I didn't move, I continued smiling at him.

-Don't worry, sir, they didn't even look at me when I walked in. And the guards outside, they didn't see me either. -I replied. I briefly wondered if this man would be mean to me. -You… you won't do anything to me, right? -I asked twisting my hands on my skirt. Madame Delamare would already have slapped my hands at that nervous gesture.

-No. I would never hurt a child but I can't tell you they won't so you should go.

-I'll go ... but when I know where my mother is, do you know this place? –I asked, the man answered me automatically shaking his head, I don't know he looked very happy but he should know. - Too bad ... the people here are very rude, I have tried to ask them and they all ignore me.

I looked down at my crossed and hooked feet, hanging in the air, I swung them, seeing how bright they were still, in contrast to my white lace stockings. I no longer knew where else to look for my mother, no one was going to answer me where she is; maybe I could look for a guide to find her house but still I felt sad because today I would not see it as I expected it to be. I looked at the man who was still watching me but now frowning, if I don't try I wouldn't know so I decided to ask him.

-Maybe you can help me, do you know a woman named Marisa Coulter? –I asked with all my hopes that he knew her; Her head tilted to the side and he looked surprised, another ounce of hope.

-Yes, I know her. She has left. What is she to you?

-Seriously?! You know her! Wait ... how did she leave? Go of die or go of travel? –I really hoped that she was “go of travel”, to find out that my mother had died without being able to see her would be horrible and very sad.

-Of travelling. She went to find his daughter. –He answered, looking at me strangely. I bowed my head to that answer. Is my mum looking for me? Didn't she think she was dead? Did she find out I'm alive?

-His daughter?

-Lyra. Apparently she is in another world. -He murmured, looking toward the door.

-Lyra… -I whispered her name; I could have jumped with happiness but I preferred to stay in my place for the moment, then I would jump with happiness, now I had to know where my mother was going and where my sister was. –I have a sister… Where to? -I asked for. The man frowned more at him and I was scared that he didn't answer me, now that he was so close.

-Halley? -He asked. Somehow it scared me that he knew my forbidden name; I jumped out of bed and ran out of the room, the guards saw me and yelled at me, following me but stopped, perhaps for not leaving their prisoner. I ran without looking where I was going but somehow I was able to go outside, there was no sun and that scared me more but I kept running; Opal had transformed into a cheetah and was running beside me.

When I got tired of running, I began to walk without direction, I had reached the zeppelin station, I boarded a trip to Oxford (the only one that remained), arriving at dawn, I had not been able to sleep on the trip; I hid for fear that adults would ask me things. When we got to Oxford, I ran away from there, into the city and there was no one on the streets, just me. The ambaros had dim light and it was scary to be on the street at that time, I was tired and hungry; I didn't want to go back to Madame Delamare's house, she would punish me and I couldn't find my mother. I remembered the words of the man in the cage, had said in another world.

-How will we go to another world?

-And who do we ask? I doubt anyone will answer us that. –Opal spoke on my shoulder, the squirrel shape of him is very cute.

-We'll find a way.

I am afraid, it is still night, very dark, I am alone and I did not know how to go to another world, besides I do not know where to go to sleep. The corner of the street, barred and with some trees, looked like an abandoned public garden; the door had a chain but I was able to get through, I just wanted to sleep for a moment, I walked down the path until I reached some steps, there was hardly any moonlight, so I put my backpack as a pillow on the first step and settled down, hoping to sleep, you will forget you were hungry.

-How did he know your name? He asked suddenly. I frowned as I clenched my belly and tried to fall asleep.

-He knows my mother, maybe she told him about me. –I whispered. He came closer to me and settled against my body.

-Don't worry, we'll find her.

His words reassured me and I was able to fall asleep. This time I did not dream of mother, I dreamed of Madame Delamare, I dreamed that she was watching me and I was moving away from a bright door, each time she was taking me further, her cold words were that it was not good, that it would not do me any good but I wanted to go , I knew I would be safe in the light and not in the dark with her but when I could let go, I fell and kept falling. I woke up scared, hugging Opal and crying. I want my mama.

A light breeze caught my attention, I remembered where I was and looked around; The place is beautiful, although abandoned, the light filtered very softly through the dirty ceiling and the branches tangled in the pipes, the dirt floor and full of dry leaves that slide in the wind, some scattered flowerpots. It would look very nice arranged but something felt weird. I continued looking, seeing the plants, some dry and others not, because of the columns they had grown, in front, there were some dirty steps with some pots but at the top was what caught my attention, there was something there, a leaf appeared out of nowhere but then on the light morning breeze, it crawled again and disappeared.

-Opal, did you see that? -I asked, getting up suddenly.

-Yes, what will it be?

We got closer, it looked like a web but when I looked closely, I froze.


	6. Dawn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marisa struggles with her mind and memoties.   
> Omniscient narrator.

The sky cleared as it began to be reborn by the blue horizon, the pleasant sight of the phenomenon has attracted the attention of human eyes from the beginning of everything even in the wild life has been attracted. The luminosity expanding in all directions while the star rose above the horizon.

His blue eyes watched that morning twilight, the new beginning and symbolically, the beginning of a new stage in his life, one in which she would be with his daughter, Lyra, in it.

As his eyes absorbed the colors melting and illuminating the night sky, she imagined what his new life would be like with his daughter; she had vowed to be a better mother, to learn to be one, to make no more mistakes and not be like her mother. She would be a mother who listens, who comforts, who encourages, who taught everything she knows and what she would know. She planned a trip to the lands that her daughter always longed for and she would show her every little thing there, every phenomenon; she would teach him everything and they would discover new ones.

She smiled at her reverie, put aside that phenomenal vision, no longer so attractive, and her smile widened as she imagined her daughter's smile when she reached the top of a mountain and saw the northern lights in its splendor or the melodic laughter that he would bring to their ears once they joked with each other over breakfast or lunch.

She remembered the still of Lyra at two years old, how precious and tender she looked with those curlers framing her plump face, her little hands taking the margarita with devout softness, her chocolate eyes were what she had always treasured but in some strange way; the memory was combined and the chocolate eyes were incorporated into bright dark blue with a gray center, the brunette hair was joined by a ginger one.

She shook his head, closing his eyes and continuing to push for it to happen; her eyes blazed at the comparison that her mind is playing, she sighed and took a handful of the leather of her daemon, a nefarious attempt to discard but it didn't seem to work. Her mind conjugated the two girls, showing her the resemblance; she knocked the golden monkey to the ground, who complained to the blow and sobbed as he watched half of him. Marisa looked into the monkey's brown eyes and snorted.

-I do not need that. I do not want it.

Aggression was tinged in his words, clenching his teeth and his face froze in anger as she watched his other half as if having him in his sight was annoying and repulsive but she softened when saw the wail and the lowered head of his dæmon. The monkey responded with soft growls that only the woman could understand from her connection.

-A simple girl, like any other. We have seen girls with that hair and eye color, what is the difference?

His monkey did not seem to have the answer to that question, he looked at the ground as if he could contain the answer to offer to his other half and when he seemed to have it, he responded with soft low growls. The woman frowned and bowed her head and the monkey approached her, climbing onto her seat but the woman looked away from her, her face undaunted but frustrated.

-No. It is impossible. We must concentrate on finding Lyra, it is what matters.

The monkey looked down, sitting on the seat, wondering why she was reliving it, it had been in the past for all those affected, his other half had never said that set of letters again, it had been prohibited. He remembered that even Asriel had removed all that fact from the chest of memories of him, from the root. The monkey did not understand what had happened to resurface this conflict in the other half of him and the game of images that his mind developed, everything had started in the moment after the mysterious girl but he could not find a solution to the question, why?

Marisa felt the conflict of the monkey, of course, it is her same conflict, both managing the problem of her mind and I thought she wanted an answer of the reason why she is reliving something that she preferred to leave it in the past and deep down more inhospitable out of his mind, she didn't want to keep thinking about it for fear of more memories. Her blue eyes returned at dawn, in an attempt to be distracted but she could no longer, she took her notebook and her pen, trying to continue with the calculations that she had left but her mind did not want to obey it either; she closed the notebook in frustration, feeling her mind return to internal conflict. Who was that girl? And what had she done with her?


	7. Other Worlds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halley goes through the window and finds the most unexpected person.

I walked away from… that. It felt strange, more than already was; I sat on the steps far away from it, looking towards the place where that thing was, it looked like a mirror but more like a window. I played with my laces with one hand while the other circled my legs, my chin resting on my knees, watching and waiting who knows what. Do not encourage me to approach again.

-Maybe it is the entrance to the other world. -Opal murmured into my shoulder, in the shape of a gecko with little patches.

-If there is another world there, we must go to find my mother.

-And food. -He added after hearing my belly growl. I sighed, took my backpack and walked towards the "mirror", approaching with fear but in the same way, I crossed. It was a strange sensation, not only because the climate is different, in this world it was hot, but it seemed that I had crossed something gelatinous but light. I looked at this new world; Inside a building or something like that, it looks like it will soon collapse, the terracotta walls.

I went down some stairs, I saw a tower in the distance, I kept walking until I heard the sound of footsteps, I walked down a corridor and I hid behind a wall, and I saw a girl; she walked enthusiastically, I began to follow her. The older girl entered a place with an iron fence that squeaked when it opened, I followed her after a few seconds and luckily it did not squeak; Coming down the stairs, I stopped behind the wall and saw the girl enter another "mirror." I waited a moment in case she came out, my belly reminded me that I had not eaten anything since the day before for breakfast, I went back to the street and looking for food was easy. I looked around when I took a fruit from a wooden box that was lying on the floor, there was no one; It is early in the morning that usually the adults should have been up at this time but no one was there, which is strange.

I continued looking at the houses and the street, a lot of silence, it seems that it is an empty world ... and dirty. In the distance, I saw some children close to my age but quite tall, they stopped when they saw me, the strange thing about them is that they had no dæmons. The children began to run towards me, scared I ran back to where the older girl had gone and without thinking, I entered the window; I hit a wall and fell on my back.

-Auch. -I complained while rubbing my head.

-You're good? Opal asked, landing next to me in the form of a blue and black bird.

-Yes, I'm fine. That was strange. -I mumbled as I got up off the floor and brushed the dirt off my dress.

-Yes, it was. They don't have dæmons, it's not normal.

-Why do you think they don't have them? -I asked while lifting the green apple that I had dropped by hitting the wall; I cleaned it with my dress and started eating it.

-I don't know but it seemed as if they had them… -He murmured looking at the ground.

-True… -I thought about that but didn't understand it and then I realized that I'm in another world; Around me I saw many trees, bushes and a small house, I approached a fence, looking at that world that is not very different from mine. I got out, a car passed in front of me, very fast, I backed up. It's not a good idea.  
Inside I saw that there was a bench and I sat on it while I finished my apple, I put my hand in the backpack, I rummaged and I removed a chain, I watched it. Gold with a round pendant, a drawing in front of a pair of mountains, a moon with only the left half on top, a comet on the right side and a star below; I turned it and it has my name on it. I finished my apple, tossed it in the brush, and put the necklace around my neck, tucking it inside my clothes.  
I waited a few moments until I heard some sounds, I jumped off the bench and saw the older girl; we look at each other in surprise. I wanted to run but she's at the exits, I'm trapped; Opal formed into a golden tiger and stood in front of me in a defensive position.

-Easeful. –The girl spoke, raising her hands, showing she won't hurt. -I won't hurt you. I'm like you.

The white ermine turned into a red panda; Opal into a balinese cat and cautiously approached the girl's dæmon. The girl with short brown hair down to her shoulders; She seems like she's good, friendly but I stayed away from her even though she didn't seem to mind her as she started to approach carefully.

-Hello. –The girl greeted, with a smile. -I'm Lyra.

I felt my eyes widen with surprise, I looked at the girl ... my sister, I looked at her face, I can't believe I'm watching her, I wanted to jump, run towards her and hug her but it would be strange and I'm afraid she will reject me.

-Hello. - I greeted shyly. She moved closer to me but she stopped a couple of steps away.

-What is your name? -Lyra asked, kneeling to be at my height, although she was still taller.

-Harri… Halley.

-Halley. -She repeated, smiling. -What a pretty name you have.

-You too. -I mumbled. Lyra smiled more, I slowly approached her, looked at our dæmons.

-He is Pantalaimon but I call him Pan.

-Opalaiden, Opal.

Both daemons smelled their pretty black noses as they moved, picking up their scents and getting to know each other; suddenly Opal changed into a brown ermine and ran around Pan, who also turned into an ermine but white. Opal is smaller due to the age difference but they are both pretty; I looked at Lyra with an amused smile. I took my backpack off the bench and looked through the trees and the fence, at that world; I walked through that park, watching people pass by in strange clothes, some with strange things in hand.

-This place, is it safe? -I asked her as I walked with my hand on the fence.

-I wasn't in this place long to find out ... I'm in the other world. It is safe there. -She whispered, seemed sad; I looked at her and didn't know what to do. Why would she be sad? She leaned down and leaned her elbows on her knees, her hands passing her face, her daemon speak her but I did not hear what said to she since I continued to think what to do or say.

-You're good? -I asked, being the only thing I could say. She raised her eyes with tears and nodded, I opened my mouth but the movement to my left stopped me. A boy appeared, almost running; With a tanned complexion and lots of very pretty curls, he turned to Lyra.

-What are you doing by disappearing like that? -Asked the boy without detecting me; Lyra looked up at him after wiping the tears from her. -What happened? What's going on?

-I have lost it. -Lyra spoke in a voice like broken.

-Lose what? -Asked the boy, confused.

-The alethiometer ... someone took it.

-But we need it. Without that, we will never find my father. -The boy was exasperated, even without noticing me.

-I know! -Lyra yelled. The boy sat next to Lyra, they talked to each other and I felt uncomfortable; I wanted to help recover whatever it was that my sister had been stolen but I was afraid that she would know who I am to her and she will reject me, besides that it was only minutes since we met and she would not be trusted ... I guess, I am not very clear how it works. She had said that she is in the other world so I could go back, connect more with my sister and find a moment to tell her who I was. It could be a good plan but I was afraid I would not see her again if I left now; Opal turned into a ring-tailed possum and climbed onto my shoulder, whispering to me that we should stay close to them.

They both got up and made a plan to find the person responsible, Lyra looked at me when she remembered my presence, and smiled.

-Will we meet in the other world? -I asked getting closer; I looked closely at my sister's features, her brown eyes are beautiful, with a beautiful smile. I wondered if it had any resemblance to her and which one would have of our mother.

-The our? -She consulted, frowning a little and tilting her head.

-No, the other, the one with the orange houses, with empty and dirty streets.

-Of course. -She smiled at me, infecting me and I smiled back.

-Hi, I'm Will. -The boy with pretty curls appeared, raising the corner of him; he looks cute. Opal noticed the lack of his dæmon like the other children, I don't know it felt strange and my sister seemed calm next to Will.

-Hi, Will, I am Halley. -I spoke to him smiling at him. -The other world, is it safe? -I asked to they.

-Yes, is it. You'll be fine there, I'll find you later. -She answered me. I did not feel safe returning to that world where the children followed me but I could see her there again, I think I can face it.

-Then, we'll see you soon. -I say, happy. I wanted to hug her and feel her perfume but I didn't dare. I feel very shyness. -I'll be near the tower, just in case.

They both nodded with a smile, we said goodbye with a ‘see you’ and I walked to the mirror and entered; I walked through the streets very quickly until I was in front of the tower, I didn't look much, I just quickly entered a cafe opposite. Luckily for me, there was food before, looking around if I found someone but like the streets, empty since I ate quietly and lay down on a bed behind the cafe; sleeping instantly.

A nightmare woke me up, all sweaty and crying, the whole small room in darkness, I grabbed the blanket and covered myself up to the top of my head, I took the pillow and pressed it to my chest, surrounding it with arms and legs. My tears tickle my skin and then wet the fabric of the pillow. Opal settled on my neck, also scared.

-Ma… ma… mama. -I cried with lots of hiccups. I closed my eyes very tightly, I waited for mum to arrive and hugged me, taking my fear out but she did not come, however, a lullaby reached my ears; soft, calm, sweet. Very nice, only that coo is heard in the room, I sighed, I put my thumb to my mouth. I wonder where it came from but I didn't want to find out, also, I'm alone… I think it's the moon. It is the lullaments of the moon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi people!  
> Lyra and Will are here!  
> It has really been a challenge doing this chapter but I hope I did it well. Tell me in the comments if you liked this meeting. I know it was very brief but there was not the opportunity too many with the conflict in that episode 3. Feel free to express yourself, I love reading the comments that you have sent me in the previous ones. Thanks for your support.  
> Next, Marisa.


	8. The Dynasty Fell Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dissatisfied, Marisa thinks of Asriel and allows herself a moment of weakness.  
> Omniscient narrator.

Mechanical problems, in every human mind causes annoyance and anger, because Marisa Coulter felt that furious current through her veins when the zeppelin caused strange noises, they informed her that they should stop and disembark in a fishing town in the north. She had gone to various places in the north, seeking more information about the whereabouts of her daughter but to no avail. She still had to go to Svalbarb but she could not enter through Asriel's window in the presence of the Magisterium's vigilance; the anxiety of her that already lived in her, incorporated to the anger of this mishap.

With a slight hope, she waited for the problems to be solved while she wrote briskly in her notebook and read some papers; She had left the girl's conflict behind, scoring it as something stupid that will go away with time, although for a moment, she felt a strange feeling that her daughter is in danger, which made her more moody. The zeppelin landed in the town and through the window she saw the armed men, the crew members were running to solve the problems, but she Marisa could see that this problem would be solved for the next day. Annoyingly, she got up and got off the zeppelin; she approached a guard and informed him where she could spend the night, she huffed and headed to that hotel / canteen.

The contrast between her person, elegant and neat, and the place, without frills. Her face visualized the place with disgust and a greater frustration ran through her bloodstream but she ignored it, knowing that she had no choice but to accept it, because it is not the first time in her life that it happened on her travels, she thought about the times that he slept outside when she began his explorations.

Upon learning of Lee Scoresby's presence, she saw that there was a good deed in this misfortune, a victory and joy enveloped her; She with great ease, she managed to enter the prison with satisfaction and pride, although she had not thought that she would leave with all the opposite feelings. She felt fatigued when she got to the room assigned to her, they had already given her the communication that the zeppelin is recomposed and ready to sail as soon as the first rays of the sun are contemplated, with that, she notified that they will return and go to Oxford.

Taking off her velvet coat and hat, she took a seat at the dresser, removing her hairpins and makeup. She observed herself in the reflection of the mirror; her face pale and weary; she noticed there was no sparkle in his eyes but it alluded to the lack of sleep.

She thought of her conversation with the aëronaut, of how dear her daughter is and I contemplate how admirable she would be as soon as she came of age, probably more formidable than she and her father since neither of them are approved.

For a brief moment she thought of Asriel, his words on that top of the mountain, in his nearness and his icy lips sliding his words with passion; still resonated in her mind each night and each time she felt a certain regret that she had not gone with him through the window and started a new beginning with him. She could not deny that still produced certain feelings that made her act like the young woman in love from thirteen years ago and of course his feelings would be deep, he is his equal, he is the love that she would never find anywhere in the world or any other world, is the father of his-

She swallowed, stopping that thought abruptly, her eyes frozen. Blink, she had a plan and it would be done no matter what. Her determined face of hers did not go unnoticed in her reflection; She got up from her seat, calculated the route of her trip and decided to wake up at dawn to arrive at Oxford even tomorrow. She had the crew informed of her decision and sent a telegram to Boreal. All done, she crawled into bed, to her surprise and her relief, it smelled of lavender, so she fell asleep quickly with her golden jumpsuit on the adjacent pillow, rolled up on himself.

She woke up suddenly, a sensation flooded her, something could not put words to it; She was aware of it since it is not the first time that this feeling alters her but she worried that she went at this time. She turned on the lights and visualized the time, just a few minutes later than when she went to bed; she frowned and glanced at her golden jumpsuit, who lowered her gaze. Marisa uncovered and got out of bed, looking for a prized object that she always carried with her; she rummaged in her purse until she found it.

With extreme delicacy, she brushed the fabric with her thumb, feeling in his touch the softness and texture of the very soft pastel reddish material; the center of her chest hadn't dampened the feel of her but she focused on the little baby sock. She brought it to her nose, sniffing the scent with her eyes closed, her face contorted to the stimulus of sensory memory, her memories flowed for a moment, the allowed one. The last time she had done it was after informing Asriel.

A conflict engulfed her as she pulled away and put it away or kept it close, her quick decision has been brief. She thought about it as she went back to bed, allowing love and accepting that afternoon, she had weakened the shell of her heart and granted her feelings, prioritizing her maternal ones. She turned off the lights and settled into the comfortable bed, singing the lullaby of her little kite, imagining that her baby would hear it with the help of her memory; She calming down, closing her eyes, listening to the sound of her heart galloping in accompaniment, her little hand surrounding hers, her fingers, she rocked it from side to side while she observed the face of she who had haunted her so much in recent days. Tears fell at her memory, the memory of her weight on her chest as she held her producing a different weight, a painful one that tore inside her heart, squeezed and burned. She heard the crying of the monkey next to her, ignoring it, she tightened her grip on the sock, pulling it closer to her nose; she sighed and fell asleep tired of crying for her two little ones.

There was still no illumination of the star when Marisa Coulter walked down the empty street, her forehead always high as she made her way to the zeppelin, passing the armed men; A smile appeared on her red lips as she climbed up and the engine started, ready for her to meet her daughter. A silent promise had been made in the night hours that only the presence of the bright stars and the creator had heard. Her focus has been placed more prominently on her mind, heart, and spirit; Doing this for everything that was denied and taken away when her dynasty collapsed, taking all the small and cutting pieces to rebuild it, has left her wounds in herself but she was missing all those that she had not realized she would need in her life as a vital necessity and is her daughter, for the honor of what she could not get back, the promise had been made and she would achieve it, whatever it takes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello gente!  
> This is my favorite Marisa chapter, for the moment, of the ones I have done. I love that episode 3 and her wardrobe, the crust in her and her place.  
> I have tried to do it as long I could but I think it is fine as far has gone, I did not feel that there was more to add and I hope you enjoy it in the same way.  
> Thanks for your comments and support ^-^


	9. Discover at the Edge of the Salient

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A narration of Asriel and his thoughts around what he loves.

Discovering is finding what is unknown or hidden, uncovering what is covered or covered. Discovery is the encounter or discovery of the hidden or unknown, the recognized or discovered. For he had done both; the discovery of this world, pride in himself for the positive result of his work. This world stretched out before him in a vast green landscape from the height that he was, calling him to find more, to know him but he had a purpose to fulfill.

Discover. Finding out that he still felt numb from her made him weak and angry, confused and rejected by a rude brat girl. He clenched his molars and pressed the stone that his hand is playing with; He tried to focus on the landscape in front of him, the diverse and beautiful greens of the vegetation that could reconstruct the color palette, he marveled at the beauty that reminded him of the third dress that he had seen, in the time that even she refused to be unfaithful to her idiot husband. She looked divine but not as divine as the dark red or navy blue dress, with her blue being her favorite because it was on the occasion that her restraints had broken down and had shared their first kiss.

Sigh. He gave up, there's no way he can't stop thinking about her; Seeing her on the top of that mountain with the brightness of the window, beautiful with the previous time, was her undoing, kissing her was plummeting into an abyss from which she had no bottom to crash. Stelmaria growled slightly beside him, making it clear that she must concentrate or find some way to hold her ground, even though her dæmon knew that it was impossible to find a way to remove from his mind the woman who unconsciously was about to clog the veins and arteries of his heart, squeezing and drinking from him like a passionate vampire; Undoubtedly for him, she is a vampire, most of those who knew her saw a cold, evil vampire willing to wreak havoc if they oppressed her but he knew her true self, the one who lived within her shell, a girl who yearned for what she unknown: love, acceptance, security and being understood. He was the only lucky one to know what was inside there, he wanted to push and bring to light what was inside, he could minimally, hence the result of his research and the stubborn work to repair his dignity for the stain of his love adulterer.

Birds hum as they pass overhead, flapping their wings, heading for the horizon where the imposing sun rose and spread its light to that unknown land. A wind lulled around him, warm on his skin, playing with the leopard's silver hair, murmuring the incomprehensible voices of the jungle and heading for the canyon behind him.

-We must continue, Asriel. -Stelmaria spoke, interrupted the moment. He nodded, got up from his seat at the top and grabbed his items, ready to continue his trek through those rocky roads.

He descended the dangerous scree, analyzing his steps in correct positions; He thought about the disappointment of it, he worked decades between the snow and the cold, in the danger of a false foot on the fragility of that white mass and the snow storms, and now there it is, a very warm climate for his opinion, a rocky and jungle area, full of bugs that were about to bite him. He hates this place, he thought, not seeing the time to return to his cold world. He preferred a blizzard a thousand times to having to descend a steep rock face ready to annihilate him at any moment.

In his moment of repudiation of the place, he remembered a unique snowstorm, burning his skin and lungs as he carried his lover in his arms to the safe place; It had been a special occasion, the birth of his second daughter, his second daughter. He was always about to remember her daughters, remembering the reason for this dangerous and arduous work dedicated to them… for the future of Lyra; away from the oppressive tyranny in her world, longing that she could live with the freedom of her agency and pursue a career dream. The criterion of repudiation of her had been born with the birth of Lyra; She had taken everything from her: her land, her title inherited from her after the death of her brother, her discoveries, her possibility of raising her daughter, the possibility that Marisa will raise her daughter, marrying Marisa. Everything had been taken from him and denied him.

His sullenness had grown with all this and his anger had advanced in the last three years, he did not understand why such a burning fury had been born from that moment that he had read that letter from Marisa about the death of her youngest daughter; perhaps due to the fact that he had not been there, that he had not been able to know his youngest daughter more than he had memorized at her birth, that he did not know the story, that he could not have done anything more than find out and not even go to the funeral of his daughter, which I can not recognize either, to comfort the only woman he could love. He detested them, he wanted his dynasty built on a foundation of oppression, anguish, dead-end and corruption to collapse.

His naive mind opened a gap to an imaginary world that once his oppressive leader, tyrant, fell, he could make the life he should have, the life that had been taken from him but he knew that a life taken could not come back, revive. He wondered how something so small is capable of so much change but he knew it, the smallest and most giant had caused chaos, what had started everything, that burning and embracing tickle between his guts, he knew that Marisa felt it too, she was able to so much change interspersed with chaos. Perhaps that is why the Magisterium detested the unity of both and had denied a link, separating them and trying to conjure a hatred between them that undoubtedly would never exist.

Lyra's words about her choice in women crossed his mind, he had laughed but a girl could not understand such a thing, not one like her daughter; He had given her a light of love by telling her that it was the product of something wonderful, although it is a word that felt lacking in everything there was and continued to feel when she thought of her mother. Snorting, Lyra would never understand what they had lived through and what they had sacrificed.

-Be careful, Asriel, it's very steep. You must concentrate. -Stelmaria warned as she leapt off the rocks with her feline skill.

-We must get out of this tedious terrain soon.

Go down a rock, one foot in the wrong place. Crumbling. Conscious and uncomfortable feeling of irregular and frantic heartbeat. Stormy pain. Impact and a feeling of being in the air. Heartbreaking desire in the throat of a scream of agony. Weak, he found himself on the ground, wondering if he had died or is soon to die; he tried to open his eyes but couldn't, he tried to move but his body didn't respond.

He felt his dæmon close by, whispering his name and he guessed that his time was up, wondering if he would see his youngest daughter when he left this underworld?

-Asriel. -A female voice. Marisa? I thought hopefully that she had changed her mind and followed him all that time. No, she will not come, he understood, her daughter must be safe and he could trust that Marisa could save her when he knew that the Magisterium would go after her.

He opened his eyes, meeting the emeralds of his daemon, who pushed Asriel's cheek with her snout; With his help, he got up off the ground, checking that there were no deep wounds or breaks, only bruises and a superficial wound on the right side of his face. He tended to said wound for when he finished, he looked around him; the towering trees, the vegetation at his feet and the sunshine on the leaves seen from the top, if he wanted he could touch the top of a tree. He came very close to falling down that abyss. On the other side, the rocky terrain that he now loathed most devoutly, waiting for him to return.

He traced a path to resume the path to the labyrinth of stones; It will be a long way to reach his goal. His calculations estimate that in four to five days he would get to where he thought they would get in touch with him. With all the pain and complaints in his body, he followed the path because there was no longer enough pain to overcome everything he had experienced and everything he regretted, there was no going back, he had to continue forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi gente! I hope you liked this unexpected chapter. ^-^


	10. The Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halley finds Will and Lyra in the Tower of Angels.

The sound of the wind in the morning is very nice despite how cold it is but beautiful anyway, the fabrics swing, the leaves and branches danced from one side to the other and it makes me feel that if I raise my arms to the sides I could fly , it would be amazing to fly. The dust from the streets is the most horrible thing for the wind, it entered my eyes when I had to go through the shadows since the sun caused pain in my eyes and made me cry; I had already cried enough in the night. Rub my eyes, I no longer knew if it was from the dust or the sun or the dream.

A short distance from the cafe I found a store, I entered it in silence, I don't want to meet the children of yesterday again. I looked at the different colors of the fabric until I finally found a thin fabric in light gray with triangles and polar bears made of triangular figures in dark blue, I took it and ran away from there towards the cafe while running, I put the hat on my head and hide my orange hair.

Tired, I sat at the tables outside the cafe, catching my breath; I looked at the tower, the black angels at the bottom are very beautiful, it was still strange that there were no people and why. A loud noise of glass breaking scared me along with glass falling from the sky, shattering on the ground near me, I jumped in fright and the chair fell behind me, I looked up at the sky with my hands covering the sun and saw two people hanging at the top of the tower, I could recognize Will. My eyes opened and I started looking for the door to enter the tower but there was none, I looked around until Opal saw a staircase, I ran, my heart seemed like it was going to open my chest. I went down the stairs, trying not to fall; I opened all the doors to find the one of the tower until I saw one with a black sculpture, like those of the tower, I ran to it and entered.

-Wow. –I expressed when entering and seeing the room that seemed to be from another world. -Incredible…  
The steps that came from the staircase at the end of the room, I froze and ran to hide behind a column; I watched the white-haired man back down the stairs and behind him, Lyra. I sighed, relaxed, and ran to her, happy to find her and to be okay until I saw a wounded and sleeping Will being carried away by both of them.

-What happened to him? -I asked, getting scared again when I saw blood dripping.

-It will be fine, we will bandage it and it will be replaced. –Lyra answered me as they laid him on the bed in another room.

-I saw him at the top of the tower. I said, pointing to the ceiling and looked at him and then looked at her. -He won't die, will he? -Consult. I did not know him much but with only a few minutes, I have liked him on the other hand he is a friend of my sister, I did not want him to die.

-No, it'll be fine. She just passed out. -She explained, smiling at me. I nodded, feeling relieved and looked at Will, everyone waiting for him to wake up; Lyra's daemon came up to Will in red panda form and sniffed him.  
It didn't take long for him to wake up and Mr. Paradisi, the white-haired man, began to explain to him about a knife, Will is the wielder and began to teach him how to use it although Will seems frustrated when he could not achieve whatever he had to do; My eyes widened in surprise when I saw that Will touched Lyra's daemon, that's not right, I didn't know why but I felt it, Opal too and Lyra, who stood up suddenly. Will felt terrible for believing that he had done something wrong, however Lyra calmed him down and explained that he is not from our world and he does not know. For us, it's strange, abnormal, I felt like when they spoke yesterday, uncomfortable. Forgotten topic when Will practiced again and succeeded. I watched from afar the mirror than he made, exactly like the one I crossed to reach this world, which the old man called a window, I was surprised. So they are done, with strange things; I wondered if the knife is for that or there was something more important, it must have a reason.  
I felt happy and proud when the old man called Lyra, intelligent, the look and smile she shared with Will made me very happy, they are good friends with each other and they help each other a lot. The man told Will that the knife would keep him safe from the spectres ... and what is that? After telling us that we should go, Will wanted the adult to accompany him to keep him safe but he refused. Finally we left and it was already dark, Will looked at the tower and Lyra had to convince him to leave; I went to where I was staying, I was very sleepy, it was a very long and very short day at the same time. I should eat something first and take a bath, too.

-Halley. -Lyra called me, I looked at her before entering the cafe. -Come with us.

-Yes, you must not be alone. -Will added.

-Mmh… okay, I can stay one day.

I followed them to where they were staying, it is a very nice, simple house. Will had gone to bathe and Lyra told me that tomorrow they should do something while we ate; I wanted to ask her so many things, especially about our mother and where to find her but I must remain calm and at least wait for tomorrow. Lyra told me I could go to sleep on a bed in her room and she left with a couple of towels for Will, I watched him disappear down the stairs.

-Opal, I'll tell her about what I am of her, tomorrow but I don't know what to do next. Stay here with them or keep looking for mum. -I muttered looking at the little yagouaroundi puma.

-Tomorrow we can find out after you tell him but I know you want to go with your mother. Something tells me that she will not tell you, for something she runs away and for something your mother is looking for her. -He asked, sitting down next to me.

-Right, something happens. I nodded, Opal raised her snout to me and I stroked his little head. I got up and ran to a sofa, wanting to sleep, I didn't want to disturb Will and Lyra so I preferred to sleep on the sofa. I hugged Opal and fell asleep as soon as I closed my eyes.

Just like the night before, I woke up in the dark shaking from a nightmare, a couple of tears wetting my cheeks. I tried to make the nightmare go away but it always came back, I sat down and hugged my legs, squeezed my eyes.

-Mummy. -I called. -I want ... I want my mummy...

Wanting to feel that someone loved me, protected me and that if I was afraid, they would hug me strong, strong, is what I always wanted. In Madame's house I don't have that, they have never hugged me, or smiled! My chest always hurt or I have something stuck in my throat when I'm alone, like now, that's why I don't care what they say about my mum, she is my mama and I need her, a lot.

-Halley. Hey -I heard Will's voice, I raised my head a little to look at him, he crouched next to me. -It's okay. It was just a nightmare, they are not real, they are just your fears, alright?

-It seemed real. I murmured against my arms.

-I know, sometimes it happens to me but I remind myself that nightmares are only in my mind and that they will not hurt me, that they will disappear. -He murmured sweetly. I didn't answer, I wanted to believe him and I believed him a little. -How about I stay here until you sleep again?

I nodded; He helped me lie down and covered me, took my hand and stroked it in circles, it was reassuring and helped a lot. He waited a few minutes until he thought I was asleep when not, my mind concentrated on imagining mum; blue eyes, elegant, beautiful smile, fun, cherry blossom scent, beautiful words and beautiful voice ... beautiful as Lady de Geneva, so beautiful, that she is affectionate and likes to hug me and comb my hair. I remembered a girl who had once gone to the house of Madame Delamare, her grandmother. Madame Shelly always arranged her hair or caressed her cheek, she is very attentive to her; her mother had gone to look for them, the girl ran to her mother, hugged her and gave her a little kiss on the lips ... it was strange but you could see her love. I want that very much and I'm sure I will have it.

The next morning, I heard the voices of Will and Lyra, rubbed my eyes, and moved closer.

-Good day. –I said as soon as I got to the table where they are drawing. They both answered and smiling, I rested my elbows on the table and a fist on my head, taking a glass of water that was there, drinking. Lyra and Will continued their conversation about a man's house and said that in the evening they would leave; I went to the dresser, brushing my teeth and my hair under the cap, changed my clothes without first taking the photogram of the baby in the arms of a woman and putting it in the pocket of the black dungarees with small blue flowers. I looked at the baby photogram before putting it away, daydreaming. I headed over to where my sister and her friend are, ready to talk to my sister.


	11. Do the Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hally talks to Will & Lyra.   
> Sensitive topics and open-hearted feelings.

I ran into Will, he explaining that Lyra had gone to shower. I would love to shower but she gives me something to ask. I sat next to him, watching as he held his hand with a bandage and I saw his face of him with a pained expression, pale and with a purple color around his eyes, his skin shining with perspiration.

-Shouldn't you be lying down? -I asked, tilting my head to get a better look at him.

-I'll be fine. -He said in a low voice. -I must be conscious to help Lyra.

I nodded, and leaned back on the sofa, Opal lay down on my legs and began to play with the golden monkey hair like Lady de Gineva's; I felt Will starting to look at me.

-What's her name? -Will asked, I looked up and saw that he was talking about Opal.

-Opal. Opalaiden, actually, but I call it Opal. -I replied. -Does your world have no dæmons?

-No, we don't. Lyra believes that it is but that it is not visible.

-That makes sense and it's great… like a ghost, inside you. -Speak enthusiastic, he smiled at me and nodded, looked at his injured hand.

-Although it would also be good to keep it in mind and talk to someone who understands you because they are with you in everything. Would not be lonely. -He murmured seriously and sadly.

-Maybe you do ... talk to her and that she's with you. Opal and I are one in two bodies but you and she must be one body. -I tried to think about how it would work for him and his dæmon, I couldn't not have it so I think he has it inside of him, in his heart. His brown eyes are watching me, his brow furrowed perhaps also thinking about that operation.

-How old are you? -He asked me, missing me that he will ask me suddenly. I lifted my five fingers from my hand.

-Five.

-Five years? How is it that you talk like that, so... well? -He questioned surprised. I wanted to laugh at how funny it looked from the surprise.

-Madame, the woman who takes care of me, taught me and I suppose it is also from reading, Madame says that it is important that I read to say good words and not speak like a fool. -Explain.

-Your mother?

-No, I think Madame would be my grandmother ... I'm looking for my mother.

-You are too small for all this adventure. -He spoke, frowning.

-I know but I want my mom and I'm going to find her. -I said sure. Will looked at me in surprise and then smiled at me, nodded.

-I think I can understand. If my mother were far away, I would also seek her tirelessly and I would not give up… You are a brave little girl, H, that's good.

-Thank you, Will ... you should rest, I'll go see Lyra, you take care. -I said, noticing his pained face. I ran towards the stairs to a room with a giant bed and behind, as in a "separate" room, in the corner a small one with a staircase of one step, where my sister is sitting with her hair wet.

-Hello.

-Hello. -She answered, seeing me approach, she allowed me a place on the bed, next to her. I wanted to tell him, I had decided to say it but I don't know how and I had afraid, what if she didn't love me? What if she didn't believe me? -I heard you talking to Will.

-Yes… Lyra, I… -My heart was racing very fast and I couldn't tell her; His brown eyes were watching me, waiting for me to say something but I couldn't. -Will you go to a safe place?

She sigh and look up at the ceiling. -I don't know but I don't think so. -She said, looking at me again.

-But do you know him? -I asked her, she could see that she was feeling nervous about going to the man's place. I felt Opal's stares for my cowardice.

-Well… I have seen it, a while ago when I lived with my mother. -She answered, frowning. -I think they work together. -She murmured. I looked at Opal, we are close.

-Oh, he is your mother's friend, that's good. -Talked while thinking that maybe it would be a good idea to visit this man and talk to him, if I has lucky, he would take me to my mother.

-No, it is not. -Lyra spoke, cold and that strange to me, does Lyra know what they say about our mother? Does she believe they are true or does she know they are true?

-Why you say so?

-My mother ... -She murmured and looked up the stairs, his gaze seemed to be in a memory. I waited for her to continue, curious of her opinion of our mother but she didn't say more; she shook her head and looked back at me, smiled. -Tell me, how is it that you are here?

I wanted to sigh, scream but I didn't, I looked into her eyes, trying to know what she was going to say about our mother. Opal is right, as much as she is with my sister and wants to meet her, I only loved my mother and I had promised myself to find her.

-I'm looking for my mom ... I found those things that Will does with that knife and I ended up here. But I must keep looking for her, I must go. -I got out of bed, ready to find mum.

-You can wait a day and I'll find out where your mother is.

-I can't wait, I must go. -I said excited. I thought of how to go see this man, a plan that might work; I'm so close to her. I looked up at Lyra, she was smiling at me tenderly; I felt bad for having to leave her but if mum is looking for her that means she would see her again. -Can I ask you a question? -Lyra nodded still with her smile. -Do you miss your mother?

Lyra's smile fell, she looked at Pan.

-I mean ... I don't remember my mum, my supposed grandmother took me away from her years ago and educated me but I still miss my mom, and that's weird, right? -I asked, Lyra looked at me with a frown. -She told me that my mother is not well, that she has left me and as if I have to get away from her but I can't stop wanting to be with her because, what if she is different with me and change? Be better with my help? -I spoke, looked at the window. -I wanten her and it's weird because it's as if she's always calling me to come back to her... I read that when a baby is in the mother's womb, always hears her heartbeat and remains in one's mind even when she is old, remembers deep down of his memories the sound of his mother's heart, did you know? Wouldn't you want to listen to your mom's heart again? I do.

-The truth ... I was not raised by my mother, my parents denied me. My father pretended to be my uncle until, the one I later found out to be my mother, told me that he was my father. My mother looked for me and also pretended to be someone else and took me to live with her, without any hint of wanting to tell me that she is my mother ... in turn, they did horrible things and I hate them for it, I can't believe them.

I sighed, and looked at the ground before looking at her. She has not answered any of my questions. -Then you don't feel it ...

-Sometimes, not always, I want to talk to my father like the last time I saw him, before than… it was so, it felt so… genuine, normal. I already knew that he is my father and he knew that I knew it. -She spoke, gulped and looked at her hands in his lap, his face looking sad and confused. -And sometimes I want my mother to arrange my hair like she always did or joke like we used to do, but sometimes, just sometimes I want that; remembering what they did to other people and that they denied me all my life, that they lied to me, makes me not want to dream that way anymore.

A pain in my chest, right in my heart knowing that my sister had lived something of the life that I wanted, feeling the love and devotion of parents, it made me very sad, she felt love and ... happiness but it is good that she had felt that, she hadn't lived like me or with someone like Madame. I looked at the ground, from side to side, trying not to cry.

-They love you, that's good to know, right? -I asked.

-They don't love me. My mother cares about me, she is always looking for me but I hope she did not find me now, I mean, sometimes she is good but she does not do good deeds, you understand? -She spoke but my eyes remained on the ground.

-I understand, Madame is something like that although she has never… -I said, pressed my lips together and denied. -I get it.

I hadn't thought about it and I don't want to, thinking and talking a lot about Madame made me remember that I should go to my mother.

-It makes sense that you look for your mother. I want to help you. -I listened to Lyra, after a while in silence and raised my eyes to her.

-It's okay. -I mumbled. -I hope we can meet again.

-You're leaving? -She asked. -Now?

-Yes. -I nodded, smiled and threw myself to hug her. She stayed like a rock but then she relaxed and wrapped her arms around me, felt good; my first hug with my sister and when I reluctantly parted, we smiled and said a goodbye that I hoped wasn't a goodbye forever. I watched her before going down the stairs and saying goodbye to Will, she didn't seem to notice but after a promise with Opal that we would return to her. I ran outside, one idea in my mind and ready.


	12. Subordination, Intense pain & Collide.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marisa becomes frustrated, saddenes, and dreams about what was denied her, what she could have been and done.  
> The worlds collide.  
> Omniscient narration.

The definition of contentment is: that he is cheerful, happy and satisfied; What you are satisfied or satisfied with what you have or get. This was how Marisa Coulter felt when she got off the zeppelin after a whole morning and afternoon in the air. She agreed that in the morning she would see Carlo Boreal so at the first rays of the sun, she had already woken up and enlisted to see Boreal, eager to know where her daughter was.

She went to the restaurant that had been with Boreal, had continued with that good condition until Boreal caressed his fingers. Her feelings turn to annoyance, disgust, his indignation caused her to take a handful of the hide from her dæmon; she hadn't predicted that Boreal would have feelings for her. She does not like this type of surprise and despite her annoyance that the person who trusted her the most and who is a buddy in the Magisterium had a romantic perception of her. She calmed down, smiled like the lady who had instructed her to be, and only in order that he has knowledge of the location of her daughter and was going to take her to her.

She followed him to an abandoned public garden and saw it: a gap, without luminosity like the one Asriel has made, this gap is neat with a clean, discreet cut.

Crossing and knowing those worlds so different from the one she is used to, had made her feel unprotected, defenseless and unstable. The world that Carlo had brought her to, moved in a hurry, had similarity to her world but her technological advances surprised her.

Before being in the presence of Boreal it was a mere annoyance but nothing more, a passing sensation but now that she knew his feelings and noticed the unfiltered flirtation (not being a good conqueror for her perception), she felt irritation mixed with boredom while teaching him the " riches ”of this world. Marisa knew that perhaps in other times and other circumstances she would have looked around and studied this world, however this is not bringing her closer to her daughter, although Boreal had told her that they should be patient and wait for the children to come. When the conversation turned to Lyra, her interest appeared, similarly, the annoyance and disgust continued in her bloodstream so it was relieving to leave without him behind her heels.

Meeting this doctor, her frustration and anguish succumbed. She was in the car for a while, thinking about what this world could offer her, both as a professional like a doctorate, a name and being able to be a mother without insults, judgment and criticism behind her shoulders. She could have lived a happy life with her daughters, they would have everything she would want for them; she wouldn't have even done horrible things for what she wanted.  
Perhaps, she would not have lost her in this world. She felt that all this was taken from her, without a doctorate, without her daughters, unhappy, lonely and being tried by men as if her words were the rope around her neck, anxiously waiting for her to die. She once again questioned herself not having gone with Asriel, the only one who could fully understand her, however there is no going back, she must find her daughter.

-Concentrate. -She murmured as she started the car, looked at the back seat and remembered that he is not there, sighed and felt that little pain that she had ignored for years. Accelerated and reluctantly, she entered Boreal's house, unaware if he had noticed that he had arrived. She was surprised at her attempt to comfort her daemon but with a refresh, ignored him and went down to the basement where she met Boreal who apparently decided to clog her last nerve, treating her like a woman with hysteria like everyone else in his world. A grave memory of the time of her infidelity and Lyra's pregnancy, of how a woman's right did not exist. Irritable. She didn't understand how he intended her to be trophy, a piece in her ridiculous collection. Stolid, cenutrian.

Meanwhile, in the empty world of Cittagazze, in the city of Magpies, the little Halley followed Will and Lyra, hidden from his sight and the sight of her sister's dæmon; she watched both teens enter the tower from underground and carefully enter behind them. When Will and Lyra said the plan, and went back outside so Lyra was a distraction, Halley waited for Will to return as she could sneak in more easily. When he made the window, she infiltrated behind him, passing into that world and that basement; she carefully slid behind a wall to the side, next to a small table with an aqua green vase.

She watched Will close the window and enter the room, decided to wait and think what she could do when saw the man or when he will find her.

Marisa admired the work and deception of both teenagers but it could have been done better, in the same way she was happy since her daughter, her Lyra is there, in front of her; her tears accumulated to the joy of seeing her. More higher, the waves at the ends of her longer hair, her body is beginning to change with curves, more fashion sense. The only thing that had hindered him was her face in her panic to see her there.

Lyra, in turn, panic and terror were spread within her; she tried with all her might to make her face serious and angry; she remembered the girl's words that afternoon however this reminded her with greater fervor that she must have distance from her evil parents. The words of her mother produced some encounters in her heart, she debated whether to believe her or not to believe her but to deny her friendship with Will, her mind and her hatred for her mother was restored.

Chaos is unleashed in a single expected and unexpected pull.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it.  
> Don't forget to leave a comment!  
> Thanks for your reading :3


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